A NEIR’S DISASTROUS BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION

Much has been written about the historic 185 year-old Neir’s Tavern in Woodhaven.  Movies have been filmed there and Mae West performed at what was an abutting theatre.  Renovations paired with what were three partners, is now one owner, Loy Gordon. 

It was the evening of August 28 that Ernie Leibovitz was celebrating his 67^th birthday.  Ernie is not just one ordinary guy living in Woodhaven.  His “more than hobby” was about music.  He listened, played the guitar and sang.  Neir’s has been noted for being a place to “do your own thing”.   Karaoke, poetry and musician nights where one could bring their guitar and sing.  That is what Ernie does best and has been known to bring many customers to drink and dine.

Neir’s has two areas, one being the bar and the back which houses the restaurant and stage.  Loy knew that Ernie would be coming there to celebrate but was off that day. Luke Palmer had become the General Manager, Steven, the lead chef had the night off as well and it was Thursday’s special of their Prime Rib Dinner of which a few groups of tables arrived early.

I joined Ernie and his family for the event.  His wife Deveka invited members of her family as well. Her nephew and his family came in from Vermont or New Hampshire…far.  Added to this were Ernie’s friends.  It was clear that many of us were there for the prime rib dinner.

Some of us even got there at about 7:15, prior to the invite time in order to be able to enjoy that special dinner so boasted about.  We ordered a drink, we placed our order and we waited.   Our abutting table began ordering appetizers.  Since the dinner seemed to be large enough, we didn’t. 

Eventually, the salad was served.  The guy who was cooking informed us that they were out of Russian Dressing.  I told him to simply mix ketchup and mayonnaise…add relish and you have Thousand Islands.    It was at least an hour that went by when we find out that they are out of the prime rib and had to cook up another one. 

Luke, being the GM, should have offered a substitute at that point instead of having us wait for another 45 minutes.  When placing the orders we were asked how we wanted it cooked.   I asked for medium-well.  I like it pink in the middle.  It is now about 9:30 p.m.  Out comes the meat.   Mine, was not only well done but dry.  Nobody got the temperature ordered.  I certainly was unable to eat mine as well as any of the other prime order folks. It was served with heavens know what mixed vegetables that were overcooked and disguised with juice to cover it up. 

As others sought appetizers such as fried calamari, fried mozzarella sticks and French fries, I tasted them.  Deveka’s nephew, sitting across from me, said that he wasn’t going to eat his fries, having ordered some sliders after finding out about the “no more prime”.   It gets bad when I eat French fries that are not hand cut.   Mozzarella sticks and calamari were an obvious pre frozen app. 

Luke kept blaming the chef and saying that he was going to have him let go and that it would be his last night. Frankly, I don't know if he has the power to fire him.  That didn’t do anything for me or anyone else this evening.   Luke talked about his background that included being a graduate of the CIA.   One woman, a neighbor of Ernie needed to have something to eat.  Luke asked if she would like a piece of salmon.  It was now about 10 and a bit late to eat for some people.  First she was told that it would take “a few minutes”. We waited.  We waited.  Luke said that it would take “eleven minutes”.    We waited. Then came the excuse that it was frozen and first had to be “whatevered”.   Oh how he boasted of his cooking when he said that he prepared it.  

At least Deveka brought the birthday cake which was served before the horrible prime rib.  Family kids were there and they surely wanted to have cake. 

Thinking that I would be eating, I ordered a few drinks.  I don’t usually drink and wound up with a headache (which I don’t normally get) due to not eating.  

It was a night of excuses and agreements that were not kept.   When you have a long time customer and knowing that it is not only the person’s birthday, but bringing at least a dozen others to join in, you can’t let the party go home so totally dissatisfied and more so, having Ernie so disappointed.  Deveka brought his guitar but Ernie was in no mood to sing. 

The owner of an establishment hires a General Manager for the purpose of running a smooth operation.  It is obvious that Luke was inept at doing the job.   

Note to our waitress….you did the best you could! 

 

JUNOON PREVIEW

I went to an Indian restaurant this evening called Junoon where Vikas Khanna is the Executive Chef. Having reviewed Purnima a few years back, I got word that Vikas would be heading this one. Rajesh Bhardwaj is the owner who told me that he gave up ownership of others for this one. The restaurant has a great atmosphere of being spacious and a more subtle East Indian decor. Junoon is located in Manhattan at 27 W. 24th Street. My friends Deveka and Ernie Leibovitz went with me to sample some of the menu.

I say, "some of the menu" because there are so many items to choose from there would have been no way for me to taste even a quarter of the offerings.

I'm calling this a preview because I want to comment on what made this place so special aside from the food itself. You know how one describes the service as being "impeccable"? Junoon absolutely defines the dictionary meaning of the word.

When seated, the chair was pulled out for me and assistance was given to help push it back to the table. The first person to come over had hot wet towels to cleanse your hands before eating and later came over after the dinner with hot wet towels. Great for both a cold night and not having to wash up before dinner.

There was one waiter who not only took the drink orders but was able to assist Ernie on which Cognac to choose and what to expect with the Japanese rice beer. He also made it a point to have our water glasses filled at all times.

Our waiter, Michael, was not only able to describe the contents and cooking methods of each item presented, but gave us a tale on why a particular lamb kabob came about.


After each set of sample dishes were eaten, all silverware and plates were immediately removed. The busboy would come over to clean the tablecloth of any food and when the food bit produced a stain, he brought over a cloth napkin to cover it up as the napkin matched the tablecloth.

If any of us got up to go somewhere, a waiter was there to refold the napkin and place it on the table.

Okay, it gets better. Deveka and I needed to use the restroom. Come on, you know that women never go alone if there are any other women at the table. Deveka asked the waiter for its locale and he simply said that he would walk her to the direction of where it is. He then pointed to a manager who would be taking her. However, when I got up the manager noticed that I had a bit of a limp and asked if I preferred to go upstairs or downstairs. Well, just outside of the downstairs bathrooms is the Spice Room, so I opted to take those steps. The manager extended his arm and assisted me down the stairs and then described the Spice Room. Would you believe that he was waiting for us so that he could escort me up the stairs and back to my seat?

Now I'll comment on the food. It appears that the herbs and spices are mixed each day so they can bring out the flavor of the particular menu item. That means that if you are having something with "curry" and you are allergic to cumin, it can be simply eliminated. I had noticed not only the array of spices, but tools such as a pestle and mortar and a few different types of grinders.

Having eaten Indian food, I expected my taste buds to bring back memories. They didn't. Every morsel of food had flavors that were unrecognizable probably due to the way the herbs and spices were mixed. In fact there was not one piece of food that was overpowered by the flavor of one particular spice.

Peppery, spicy, hot...don't give that to me. A few things were a bit like that just due to my palate. I simply tolerated it and concentrated on the other flavors. Deveka and Ernie are used to peppery, spicy, hot and for the first time did not request some type of sauce, etc. to heighten the hot.

Ernie said that he was spoiled and that he would find it difficult to eat at another Indian restaurant. Deveka agreed. I rank the food as being a number 10 out of 10. I had a chat with Rajesh to find that he was a former chef so he designed the menu. I will have him on my radio show this week!